Alexandria Harz

Alexandria Harz, LCSW

She/her/hers – what are personal pronouns and why do they matter?

Clients I work with: Adult individuals, couples, and groups.

Issues I work with: Anxiety and panic attacks, depression, emotion dysregulation, substance use, trauma, relationships, communication patterns, emotional intimacy, trust, family of origin experiences, sex, grief and loss, self-esteem, and chronic illness.

I support clients in connecting with their own inner wisdom and capacity for healing. The answers you seek are calling to you in the form of emotional and physical symptoms. These messages are waiting to be tended to and transformed into your greatest resources. 

If you are feeling disconnected, disempowered, or stuck, I can assist you in identifying and changing the thought patterns and ways of relating which might be holding you back. By prioritizing your sense of safety, welcoming heavy emotions, and guiding you to meet unknown parts of yourself, I can support you in finding freedom from the patterns in which you feel trapped.

I can help you to better organize and understand your emotional, relational, and physical experiences, especially where there is pain, confusion, and overwhelm. As a therapist, my job is to maintain a space where you can safely access and work through these challenging internal experiences. By practicing mindfulness and sustained awareness, we can increase your capacity for these internal experiences and use them to better understand and meet your needs. 

You may have developed a way of surviving or protecting that includes retreating inward or pushing others away to maintain a sense of safety. Our bodies and minds adapt to protect us in ways that can often cause us difficulty later. In a safe and supportive environment, we can work together to identify, understand, and dissolve defenses that no longer serve you.

Your go-to way of managing distress may include pursuing for connection, reassurance, or resolution. When these needs aren’t met, you can be left feeling vulnerable, abandoned, or unloveable, with big emotions ripping through you. I can help you learn more about your unmet needs, reach for others with greater safety and clarity, and heal the wounds on the inside of you that leave you doubting your worth.

Connecting with yourself and others can be scary, especially when it has caused you pain in the past, and the process of healing is one that we will pursue at your pace and on your terms.

Our life experiences shape our way of thinking and relating and continue to cause us difficulty until we make space to explore and unpack them. Oftentimes, the behaviors causing us the most difficulty are simply our best attempts at feeling better for a moment, and you deserve the opportunity to truly recover and experience wholeness.

In my work with couples, I lean on my training in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. This model focuses on creating ways of communicating that build emotional connection, security, and trust.

Couples tend to find themselves in the same old ‘dance’ or patterns of communication that leave them vulnerable to conflict or disconnection. Over time, this dance leaves partners feeling frustrated, vigilant, or hopeless in the relationship. One partner ‘pursuing’ for connection and resolution, the other ‘withdrawing’ to avoid further conflict and reduce the tension.

I work with couples to understand and deescalate their painful dance. I can help you go below the conflict, to start talking about the hurts, needs, and fractures that have been missed or are unresolved. Couples are supported to explore what they need from each in their moments of need or when their dance is in full swing. Where there have been fractures in trust or security, it is possible to repair these hurts and restore emotional security. Couples leave therapy feeling clearer about how to avoid their dance, share what happens on the inside of them during moments of stress, and be responsive when their partner reaches for them.

I also enjoy working with clients who are looking to better understand their relationship with substance use as a way of soothing or coping. We can explore the underlying pain and distress together, gradually lessening their current impact on your life. By increasing your capacity to deal with the ‘tough stuff’ – lasting change and healing become a reality.

My clinical experience includes serving those struggling with crises, mood disorders, trauma, and substance use. This has shown me that we can identify a way forward by making sense of thoughts, feelings, and experiences, and reorganizing them in a way that feels empowering and supportive to you. I employ cognitive-behavioral, acceptance and commitment, relational, somatic, and trauma-informed models in an integrated and personalized manner, suited to your needs, personality, and strengths.

I practice radical inclusion and cultural humility and look forward to working with and affirming clients of all races, genders, abilities, and sexualities.